


Nepeta: Explain Shipping Wall to Dad in great detail

by Path



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures, Problem Sleuth (Webcomic)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-22
Updated: 2011-08-22
Packaged: 2017-10-22 23:01:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/243541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Path/pseuds/Path
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You are quite cold, sitting on the floor, but so distracted at your daughter's explanations of the love lives of everyone you know that you have entirely forgotten.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Nepeta: Explain Shipping Wall to Dad in great detail

**Author's Note:**

> Based on Sannam's picture here (http://sannam.tumblr.com/post/9185461073/nepeta-explain-shipping-wall-to-dad-in-great).

You are sitting on the floor and it is quite cold except for the tea in your hand. Even that is getting about to room temperature, however, because you are paying almost, but not entirely no attention to it. Your daughter does not suffer your problems, being full of energy and enthusiasm and wearing a thick hat and your socks.

Your toes are quite, quite cold indeed. But you are ignoring them and pretending they don't exist (which is a thing you are very good at), because your daughter is explaining something to you in great detail. Her kitty hat flaps as she lectures, and her round little face and turned-up nose are covered in paint. Most of it is white, black, red, and grey, but there is the occasional smudge of dark green. That isn't on the wall, it is merely her favourite colour, so she likes to have it around.

"It's really prrrrrretty simple, Dad," she says. "Mister Sleuth and Karkitty's dad have all the quadrants."

"All of them?" you ask, utterly fascinated. You rest your long fingers against the side of your face and watch her dreamily.

"Yes, of course!" she says, and makes a little leap to the side. "Most of the time, they are the leaders of opposing gangs, and they're forrrrrced to reconcile their furrrriend with their gang, auspisticing between them. And then sometimes, they turn to each other because they know they understand what it's like, having the burrrden of leadership, and because they understand each other. They go out drinking together. They relax together. They feel better and then they go about their lives reinvigorated! That's textbook moirallegiance."

You have no idea what that last word was, but you are still entranced.

"And that's the conciliatory side of things. On the flushed side, obviously they started out as enemies, and worse, rivals, because everybody knows how Mister Sleuth offended Mister Slick when they met. That was a personal embarrassment! The hatred that sprung from that was more than just anger. It was ideal. It was a pair! That is what it led to. Kismesissitude."

You lost that word too, but you get the idea. You don't know how she found out about that meeting, though. You certainly never told her.

"And then there's red, because if everybody knows how they got started, they definitely know what they're doing now, and that's a pretty firm matespritship if I ever saw one."

You don't wonder how she knew about what your beloved leader and the nefarious gangster do together. You have had to usher Nepeta out of the building on more than one occasion, and have left some very strongly-worded notes to the captain and namesake of Team Sleuth because of it, and specifically how loud it was.

"Oh," you say, "I suppose they must have all the quadrants, then."

Nepeta is not quite done, though. "But of course they've got other pairings to fill in too, because you can't hit all the quadrants at one time with one person. So Mister Slick uses Mister Droog as a moirail, a surrogate matesprit, and an auspistice, depending on his relationship with Mister Sleuth, and then of course Snowman is his default kismesis. And Mister Sleuth has the same sort of thing but I didn't put it all down yet because it's not really as canonical."

You feel a little worried your daughter knows as much as she does (which is to say, more than you) about the movements and relationships of such a dangerous criminal. But you feel compelled to ask about your leader first.

"Oh," she says. "That's over on _your wall_ , Dad."

You look over your shoulder at the opposite wall of your office. Your daughter has been very busy.

"What is that line for?" you ask her, a feeling of dread rising up inside.

"It's an unrequited flush line over the natural moirallegiance you and Mister Sleuth have." She gives you a look that says _that should have been obvious_.

"Why isn't that over on that wall?" you ask her.

"Oh Dad, that's the canon wall," she says, looking a little regretful. "Nobody ships Team Sleuth anymore."


End file.
